Random thoughts

So I found there is no good blushing smiley face. There is an ashamed face with rosy cheeks. And a flirtateous kissy face (my favorite). But no face that says, aww I am blushing that was too cute. Because I am not ashamed.

I love my mom's car. And so does Tony. He was amazed that it turned on by touching the handle (with key in close proximity) and that you didn't need to put a key in the ignition (because there is no actual key) to start it. I also impressed him when I talked to the car and got it to change radio stations...

Also, I was having coffee with a friend, and he answered his phone and I swear I heard "I have your child." This was a little shocking becauseI know my parents do not have his number. Also, they had just gone to bed. But as his conversation continued, I realized he said "I have your chai," which we had gotten for a friend.

One last thing to leave you with, a quote from Elizabeth Elliot's book, Passion and Purity (73).
"Life requires countless "little" deaths -- occasions when we are given the chance to say no to self and yes to God."

And one last thing, from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire:
"Dark and evil times lie ahead. There will come a time when we must choose between what is good and what is easy." -Professor Dumbledore

This quote may be about a fictitious battle between the Dark Lord and the Wizarding Community... but it can definitely be applied to real life. It sounds like it could be straight out of Revelation.

today is apparently quiz day

10 LAYERS OF MELAYER ONE:

ON THE OUTSIDE
Name: Megan
Birth date: April 18th
Birth place: Ghetto San Leandro
Current Location: Redlands/San Leandro
Eye Color: Blue (and kinda green)
Hair Color: brownish (but blonde too)
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Aries (Redlands horoscopes are the best. haha)

LAYER TWO: ON THE INSIDE
Your heritage: German! And some other random Euro mix, but mostly Deutsch
What Shoes Did you wear today: my black ones, and then my snow boots
Your weakness: you! haha
Your fears: being attacked while I am sleeping
Your perfect pizza: Double Pepperoni, or Hawaiian

LAYER THREE: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW:
Your most overused phrase: I try
Your thoughts first waking up: nooooo
Your best physical feature: my humps my humps, my lovely lady lumps... haha jk my eyes
Your bedtime: whenever i stop talking on aim
Your most missed memory: being little and taken care of

LAYER FOUR: YOUR PICK:
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi, but Coke if it's cherry
McDonald's or Burger King: In N Out
Single or group dates: Meh
Adidas or Nike: Adidas
Lipton Tea or Nestea: Nestea Raspberry
Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla
Cappuccino or coffee: Cappuchino, made by daddy

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?
Smoke: once in awhile, but not cigs
Cuss: Try not to
Single: yes
Take a shower: Everyday
Have a crush(es): maybe ;)
Think you've been in love: I know, no
Like(d) high school: it was fine, college is better
Want to get married: Yes
Believe in yourself: Yup
Get motion sickness: no
Think you're a health freak: Heck No Techno
Get along with your parents: Yes I do!
Like thunderstorms: Fo sho

LAYER SIX: IN THE PAST MONTH
Drank alcohol: yes
Gone to the mall: yes
Been on stage: nada
Eaten Sushi: no, don't like much of it
Been dumped: No
Gone skating: No
Gone skinny dippin: Nope
Dyed your hair: No

LAYER SEVEN: HAVE YOU EVER
Played a game that required removal of clothing: interesting question
Gotten beaten up: no
Changed who you were to fit in: I became who I really was and then fit in, stopping hiding in a shell

LAYER EIGHT: GETTING OLDER
Age you hope to be married: 25, but that seems soon
Numbers of Children: 2-3
How do you want to die: Having a vending machine fall on me. haha jk I prefer not to think of it, maybe the end of the world will come first
What country would you most like to visit: Dont' know

LAYER NINE: IN A GAL/GUY
Best eye color?: Blue is good, but so is brown, depends on the guy
Best hair color?: Blonde.. or brown
Short or long hair: i'm more of a short hair person, but not like buzzed
Best first date location: In N Out haha
Articles of clothing: A hooded sweatshirt can be quite hot

LAYER TEN: IN THE NUMBERS
Number of people i can trust: a lot
Number of CD's I own: a ton, don't know
Number of piercings: had 9, but now 3
Number of tattoos: 1
Number of times been on T.V.: don't know, 0?
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: oh so many times, i don't keep track. Honestly, I don't know
Number of scars on my body: a little baby one, and a rug burn one from 3 years ago
Number of things in my past that I regret: donn't have regrets, just live and learn

so in 2005

2005 confessions:I confess that in 2005 i...

LOVE (OR LACK THEREOF) LIFE(x) stayed single the whole year.( ) got your first kiss(x) kissed someone new( ) made-out for the first time( ) made-out in/on a car ( ) kissed in the snow( ) kissed in the rain( ) fell in love( ) fell in love with a fool(x) had your heart broken(x) broke someone else's heart(x) had a stalker - not really, haha( ) had a good relationship with someone( ) questioned your sexual orientation( ) came out of the closet( ) gotten pregnant( ) gotten someone else pregnant( ) had an abortion( ) gotten married( ) had a divorce( ) had a gay marriage(x) kissed someone of the same sex () dated someone you'll never forget(x) done something you've regretted( ) lost your true love( ) lost faith in love(x) kissed under mistletoe - love ya vanja! haha

WORK/SCHOOL() got a promotion(x) got a pay raise(x) changed jobs( ) lost your job(x) quit your job() dated a co-worker( ) dated your boss( ) dated your boss' daughter/son( ) got fired from your job(x) got straight A's(x) met one teacher you really like( ) met one teacher you really hated (x) found the subject you love( ) failed a class(x) cut class(x) skipped school( ) got into a fight with a classmate(x) did something you were proud of( ) discovered a new talent(x) gave the teachers a reason to teach(x) proved yourself an idiot ( ) embaressed yourself in front of the class( ) fell in love with a teacher( ) got a lead in the school play( ) made a varsity team( ) made a junior varsity team(x) were involved in something you'll never forget ( ) got sent to the office - seriously?

OTHER( ) painted a picture(x) wrote a poem/song(x) ran a mile (x) listened to music you couldn't stand(x) double-dipped(x)skinny-dipped( ) went to camp(x) threw a surprise party (x) laughed till you cried( ) laughed till you peed in your pants(x) flirted shamelessly (x) visited a foreign country (x)visted a foreign state (x) cooked a disasterous meal( ) lost something important to you(x) got a gift you adore (x) realized something new about yourself( ) went on a diet(x) tried to gain weight....i always try to do that but it never works.(x) dyed your hair( ) came close to losing your life() someone close to you died(x)went to a party(x) drank alchohol(x) drank alchohol underage( ) tried drug(s) ( ) got arrested(x) read a great book(x) saw a great movie( ) saw a movie so scary that it made you cry(x) saw your favorite band/artist live(x) saw someone famous in person(x) did something you want to tell everyone (x) Enjoyed this year overall

Wow, this looked cooler when I stole it from Aaron on myspace. But yeah, enjoy. haha

My family is crazy

First, Emily and I were called old ladies all night, because we were crocheting. I think they were all just jeaolus of my mad crochet skills....

But at breakfast our parents started remembering stories of their years in Emeryville. Now Emeryville, well this city really had some ghetto parts. And our parents lived in one of those parts, in some condos. So did about half of the people their age from the church as well. But we heard about some interesting characters. They had friends Snotty and Smitty (creative?) haha There was the hooker across the street from my parents. Starting at 10 o clock, a car would park, every hour on the hour. The hooker also had a 16 year old daughter and would let her throw parties. They would get a keg and charge people to get in. Let us see, there was also Red, the crazy hooker on the corner who had huge red hair and was toked up on heroin. She would stand in the middle of the street, so the cars would stop, and then go to the window and take whatever she could. There were a couple stories about the hookers on the corner who would try talking to my dad, because there was no to on his Carmen Gia (however you spell it) - little did they know he was on his way to church.

Both my mom and Katie were given offers to be "taken care of" by strange men. My mom's story is the best though. Some guy tried to sell her suntan oil, but she could only buy it if he put it on... dirty! haha

Oh the stories they tell around the table at Christmas!

I really should have been creative with that last blog

Something to the tune of, Hey did you know there was a warrant out for my arrest this morning. Because, kinda, there was. I missed the court date and if I was pulled over could have been arrested. But I was too angry to be creative. That's another thing. Anger can have a lot of power in me. That is not good. I can get riled up pretty easily. Must be that German in me! Ja!

Ich Liebe Dich!

things you should know about me

I get bitchy sometimes. Real bitchy. Like right now. Maybe it is the lack of hormones being ingested into my body (oh how I miss that, but we are back on track on Sunday) or maybe just the general state of things. Or maybe just how I feel I am being treated.

Sometimes I think that I am a princess. And I deserve to be treated like the amazing woman that I am. And I like being the center of attention. When I am not I get angry.

Another thing, sometimes I cry really easily. I am talking real easy, usually this happens once a month and lasts for a couple days. (If any guys are reading this, I am surprised you have lasted this far) haha

Anyways. I got that ticket awhile back (pulled over for speeding, but fix-it ticket for no insurance, which is all my dad, because it was his car and it wasn't in it), when it came in the mail my mom stuck it in a basket. So I remembered to look at it today, because I thought the court date was the 1st of January. Nope. Yesterday. Not to mention it is a $581 ticket if I don't show up with my $10 and proof of insurance. And then it said bail could be increased, or arrest, or suspension of license. Well I lost it. i was a complete wreck. I just start bawling, and poor Brian is over, but he just sat there and tried to calm me down. Even tho I was crying and then getting super sweaty because of the dang humidity! haha Eventually I found an 800 number, with a recording, and called it in the hopes of finding a place to leave a message explaining that I had just gotten home from college and asking for an extension (I am allowed a 60 day extension). I actually got through to a clerk who gave me an extension until February 21st. Amazing. No more Christmas in jail... the joke was that Uncle Warren's song was soon to become mine. haha

I have spent enough time typing this and don't feel like bolding or italicizing or coloring. That is the other thing, i am lazy. Oh, well, maybe I will do a few, for emphasis.

Ps those swear words felt soooo good, because I have restrained myself from swearing for awhile. haha

there's a snake in my boots

Actually, there is a drip in my ceiling. What a wonderful thing to wake up to, right? Wrong. I cannot remember there ever being a drippy ceiling in my house. So this came as a shock. Not to mention a worry. What was Dad going to say? Well, at least this was in no way my fault (like I would have gone on the roof and drilled a hole or something). Luckily, he was home. As I was putting a pot under, he came in. Then he got the ladder and searched through the crawl space. I was imagining him falling through the ceiling onto my floor, I have seen too many movies. During this time I was drying off the floor, water had splashed all over the floor of my study, and finding out a pot just wasn't good enough: the water dropped in and splashed all over the floor. So as Dad brought the ladder into my room to pop the bugger, I put my bro's garbage can under it. We drained it out and now it is just a slight leak again.

Here are some photos of the little bubble-like thing on my ceiling.

Now for a Close up!

eyes

"Do you think your eyes are blue or green?"

"I don't know, I have always thought of them as blue."

"Interesting."

"Well, uh [at this point I'm getting nervous] you are the expert, what color do you think my eyes are Doctor Chan?"

"Well they look blue, but then under the light [which blinded me and left me with lines of light in my eyes forever] they look more green. So I just don't know."

"Oh ok."

That was my interesting conversation with the eye doctor yesterday. Apparently my eyes are more green than blue. They may appear blue, but that is deceiving, like me, they are GREEN! beat that mutha.... haha ok enough of that. Really tho, how do i fill out forms now? Do I say my eyes are green/blue? And my license? it says my eyes are blue. but if they shine a flashilght in my eyes they would be green, then i would be lieing! haha Ok I'm not really freaking out, but wouldn't it be funny if I was?

Disneyland

It is the happiest place on earth, for sure. Or the merriest, depending on the season. haha These are some photos from my lovely day in Dland!

Kelley and her backpack (friend) on the tram... from Timon 18G! haha

This is Kate and I on the tram. I was pretending to eat a granola bar, because she was.

Kelley and I took a photo at the "Kodak picture spot" in front of the Matterhorn. Aren't we just beautiful??

The three of us took a picture in front of the golden 25th anniversary castle. There are 5 crowns, one for each princess! So precious!

Santa has his reindeer at the Reindeer Roundup, how sweet is that?

We went on the Indiana Jones ride twice... you have to love a 20 minute wait! And still getting fastpasses! haha Oh and the guy would only take a picture of us if Chris (the other worker) was in it... So here is the 3 of us and Chris...

And at the end of the night we found the White Witch from Narnia. How cool is that? She was so scary though. I was almost scared to take a picture of her... but I fought my fear and documented it, just for you avid readers...

In all, we had a wonderful trip to Disneyland. I have not been since May, that is not really that long, but it definitely felt like it! And I have not been in the park during Christmastime in years. So that was awesome. They have it all cute and Christmassy. There is a holiday parade, ending with Here Comes Santa Claus. And the fireworks show for the 50th is amazing. It finishes with snow for Christmas. Wonderful. Oh, and there are now piranhas on the Jungle Cruise. That was pretty sweet, even tho our guide was way lame.

I am going to be a Disney princess one day. Or at least a dancing mermaid. Mark my words.

due tomorrow

I hate writing papers

Not really, but I am not enjoying this one

10 to 12 pages

due at 1 pm tomorrow

oh how i love procrastination. ugh!

emotional breakdown

Definitely had one last night. Terrible. I was in David's room and he was going over a paper for me. Well it was terrible. He was showing me some changes I could make and I just started crying. I said "I know this is a terrible paper, I feel like I am just repeating myself, but I just don't know what to do and I do not want to turn this in." So on and so forth, tears streaming down my face. He took it well, for a boy dealing with a girl crying over a paper. (Katie said she would have been like, uh... and then felt awkward haha) He told me that I just have a lot of extra wording and I can shorten it. but I needed to wait until tomorrow so I could think straight. I left Melrose still crying. So sad. haha

Then I went into Kell's room and crawled i her bed. I told her what happened and I was half crying and half laughing. I do not even know what was going on. She dried my tears and told me not to cry, it was just a paper. haha So we chatted and I calmed down. Then my mom saw my "emotional breakdown" away message and left me a comment. That showing me she was still awake, I called. I have a feeling she knew it was me when she picked up the phone, because who else calls at 10:30? haha She helped calm me down too. Asked if I was stuffed up because I had been crying, yes, was I breathing? Yes, now. haha Then she just talked to me for a few minutes, told me I could turn in one bad paper, how much does it really matter?

Which makes me think. Why am I so worried? The Bible says not to worry, but I forget that so often. I worry about things I think I am in control of. But I am not in control of anything, which is weird, and hard to understand, but I just take it as it is. haha

Now I am reworking that paper and it is going much better. Oh how a night's sleep can help. Althought I woke up and could tell I had a rough night, headache and stiff neck. And, worst of all, I had forgotten to grind coffee in last night's madness, so I couldn't get coffee til I got to work. (and it is not too good here either haha)

I have a bruise on my knee. I think I hit it on the wall the other night. That does not explain the bruise on my hand. Yes. On my hand. I have a bruise in the palm of my hand. And I cannot explain how it got there. Neither can I really see it. But it hurts. And only like a bruise.

So I am always hurting. But without that, I wouldn't be the little hypochondriac we all know and love.

Take this conversation from Monday:
Me: blah blah oh dad, my elbow hurts
Dad: Alright hypo we are done here
Me: But dad, i think I pinched a nerve or something
Dad: Okay I will talk to you later
Me: Wait, what about those snowboots

Saved the conversation at the last minute. I cannot talk about myself being sick or hurting too much. I think my parents get tired of it. But that is because they get the bulk of it. I mean, unless I am actually sick (ie at the health center getting lots of drug and disgusting nose sprays) then I do not really talk about my pain, only to my parents. They are going to miss it. Just you wait and see. Once our three times a day phone calls turn into once a week, they will miss it.

so

I have an exam in Research Methods in 25 minutes.

What am I doing?

Sitting in the classroom typing in my blog.

Why, you ask.

Because I cannot study. I was not made to study. I look things over a few times and then I am done. Why can't I study?

And finals... well I think they are finals because when they are over you can finally breathe again. That and you can actually get some sleep and relax. I know that is not going to happen until Friday.

2 papers due on Thursday

Megan = stressed

Holidays

Are supposed to bring good cheer, right? Well they bring Emily pain, in her ears:

moemarsita: OMG OMG
moemarsita: WE HAVE CAROLERS
moemarsita: THEY'RE REALLY BAD

And they bring me feeling of being replaced, talking to Davis about how my parents took my little cousins tree shopping today:

GhettoBootsieMeg: i feel replaced!
DSLice INKrist: me too, me too
GhettoBootsieMeg: haha
DSLice INKrist: next thing you know, they're gonna get them to decorate the tree too
GhettoBootsieMeg: i know!

haha But there are also sad times. LikeI used to love this one tree shop, but apparently it is no more, and I just found it comical how my mom said it:

buildermomck: corey's, the one with the old lady with the cider, is closed now

That old lady was great! haha i miss the days of going tree shopping. It used to be a huge ordeal. When I was really young, Mom always made Christmas sweatshirts; she was a wonder with puff paints! haha And that one year i was riding in Uncle Warren's car, sitting in the backseat with Emily, when we saw the tree fall down the side of the car. Guess it was not tied on tight enough. haha But I do miss the days of tree shopping and Negri's and the apple farm. altho my mom and I have decided that I will one day go again, and she can treat my kids to apple cider and cookies. This is going to be in a long time tho! haha

See I told you it is a big deal...

Every day in Africa, HIV/AIDS kills 6,600 people, 8,800 people are infected with the HIV virus and at least 1,400 newborn babies are infected during childbirth.

this is from www.one.org --- check it out to see what you can do to help

also check out www.invisiblechildren.org

my house

In case any of you were wondering where I am going in Salzburg... this is the house. Beautiful. It is in a park... I bet you are jealous just reading this! haha but really, this is where I will be living for 4 months, with my wonderful roommates, Kelley and Caitlin!

PS. I do not like analyzing statistics for psych experiments.

actually

I have more to say. but i needed to write that blog like that for effect.

So last night was the Invisible Children screening. It was awesome. We had a packed house in Orton... people were standing in the back and sitting on the floor in the front. Amazing. Word really got out.. plus Greeks had to go, so they brought along their friends as well. Laren, one of the producers, is really cool, altho I think I talked to much and made him bored. Oh well I probly will not ever see him again, so no biggee. But we had 11 people sign up to host a sewing party. And we sold so much, I think we made at least a thousand, if not two or three thousand dollars. Splendid. They have this new program called Invisible Academy. They take kids who have been affected by the war and that have potential and put them into secondary school (which is not free for them). It is a boarding school, so they are safe from rebels. They also give each child a mentor, who is in their 20s and lived through the rebel stuff (night commuters, some kidnapped, etc) and have made their way through school and are doing something with their lives. It costs $70 a month to put a kid through school completely. This seems really expensive to me, but I wonder how much my college education averages out to in a month. I do not even want to think about it. Oh, and there are 250 kids in the Academy right now (150 girls and 100 boys). So wonderful.

I wish I could do more

so

i DO NOT like one way streets

and being oblivious

that is all