Things are much better now... I should remember not to post when I am upset! But I did not know what else to do, I wanted to write out a muted version of what was going on in my head. I ended up calling Sarah, my best friend from high school, now a good friend, and we talked for an hour. We spent a long time discussing everything in her life before talking about me, and I felt good about it. I did not feel used or underappreciated, like I did earlier. Sarah and I talked about how we are similar in the best friends area. But that people change and their lives move on. So it is inevitable that you do not stay best friends forever. It is just weird because I saw others (Lisa, Kelley, Brenna) stay really close with friends from home, and I never had that. But I am becoming more okay with that. I have a bunch of friends who I could call at a moment's notice and they would have my back. I am okay with that too, I like having different groups of friends and different people to call at different times. I realized I have one best friend though, Matt. And that is what he should be, boyfriend and best friend. If everyone else in the world bailed on me and dissappointed me, I know he is there. I do like that a lot. He is wonderful... and here is another picture.... How wonderful is my Matthew? He will make a good Dad someday to some lucky kids...